A close friend of mine, Nya, wrote this on her FB page, “I once said, “heartache must be the most beautiful pain”…I was right. To love or to have loved someone so completely that being apart from them causes a deep physical ache in your chest, like your heart has a hole in it and your very soul feels empty….is incredible. The pain will subside and by the grace of God, the emptiness will be filled with new joys later….but to imagine never having a love like that in the first place is the greatest tragedy.”
And wow that made me think. So far this holiday season has been very hard on me. Thanksgiving was just me and my girls, getting a tree and going through all the motions that we once did as a family, going through all of the ornaments and then there is the week of Christmas which I will be without my girls (totally not looking forward to that). But Nya wrote this about heartache and as I look back she is totally right, I wouldn’t do it any different. We had an amazing love that I guess ran its course. Yes I hurt but what would it be like to go through life not feeling that love. I’m not trying to glamorize feeling hurt, believe me if I could feel no pain right now I would take it. But what a way to look at a loss of a relationship. I must remember this with every relationship, past, present and future. I am grateful for all of you. For the spark, the fire, the excitement and the loss. Thank you Nya for showing me that I can be grateful for what happens when I put my heart out in the open.
To update you on my last post, here is the piece i was having trouble with, I am finding that with life being a struggle so are my paitnings. But I was able to finish this one. 48″x36” Still needing a name.